Good Ship Venus

Verse 1

We sailed upon the good ship Venus By Christ you should have seen us The figurehead was a whore in bed The mast an upright penis

Verse 2

The Captain's name was Lugger By Christ he was a bugger He wasn't fit to shovel shit From one ship to another

Chorus 1

Friggin' in the riggin' Friggin' in the riggin' Friggin' in the riggin' There was fuck all else to do

(Chorus every two verses)

Verse 3

The first mate's name was Cooper By Christ, he was a trooper He jerked and jerked until he worked Himself into a stupor

Verse 4

And the second mate was Andy By Christ he had a dandy Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock For cumming in the brandy

Verse 5

The third mate's name was Morgan By God he was a gorgon Ten times a day sweet tunes he'd play On his fuckin' organ

Verse 6

Captain's wife was Mabel And by God was she able To give the crew their daily screw Upon the galley table

Verse 7

The captain's daughter Charlotte Was born and bred a harlot Her thighs at night were lily white By morning they were scarlet

Verse 8

The cabin boy was Kipper By Christ he was a nipper He stuffed his ass with broken glass And circumcised the skipper

Verse 9

The captain's lovely daughter Liked swimming in the water Delighted squeals came when some eels Found her sexual quarters

Verse 10

When we reached our station Through skillful navigation The ship got sunk in a wave of spunk From too much fornication

Verse 11

On the good ship Venus By Christ you should have seen us The figurehead was a whore in bed Sucking a dead man's penis